Hallion's Champion

I see you trying to come out for me Did I invite you out or Have you lurked too long in the the recesses Tired of being forgotten Back into the dark abyss you go I am no knight in shining armor Is it worse to hide you and let you lurk Silently and imperceptibly wreaking havoc Or face you in the light of day Your mere existence give me pain A pain I had forgotten I remembered Scars I didn't know I had I feel now Please Back into the dark abyss you go I am no knight in shining armor Like the Lion I have lost my courage To fight the enemy To wage a bitter battle In what seems an endless war Back into the dark abyss you go I am no knight in shining armor The war is long and I forget From whence I come For what cause I fight Bruised an battered Dirty and tarnished A better day is coming Out from the dark abyss you come I am no knight in shining armor I will fight Down you will go For I am my own soldier The cause I lost I now remember Out from the dark abyss you come I am no knight in shining armor In this light I will wage my fight Out from the dark abyss you come I am no knight in shining armor Down you will go I have more reason to win

Congratulations!

My brother Joseph just married one of the greatest girls around, Wendy. I am so happy for them! I wish them both a life of happiness and love. Love you guys!!!!

New Calling

A few weeks ago, I received a new calling in my ward. I am now a Relief Society Instructor. I am so excited about this calling. I have already taught one lesson and have another one coming up soon. I am thinking about posting some of what I have learned as I prepare and any additional thoughts from the sisters after each lesson. I think it will be a way to share some thoughts and insights I'm having for my own life and in the gospel.

Abraham's Sacrifice

I was studying in Genesis today. In Chapter 22, the story of God's command to Abraham to sacrifice Isaac is recounted. Verse 2 reads: "And he said, Take now they son, thine only son Isaac, whom thou lovest, and get thee into the land of Moriah; and offer him there for a burnt offering upon one of the mountains which I will tell thee of." As I pondered on this verse, I recalled being taught that this story is in similitude to the Father's sacrifice of the Only Begotten Son. I wondered however, what it might be teaching me directly. Or in other words, how could I apply this to my own life? It seems to me that because of Abraham's love for the Lord, he was willing to sacrifice the only thing he had and loved, his son. Am I willing to make the same type of sacrifice? The only thing I have in this life that is truly my own, is my will. Perhaps this scripture is not only teaching me of the Atonement, but also of my need to make a similar sacrifice through obedience as a testament of my love and trust in the Lord. If I truly love and trust in Him, then I will be willing to sacrifice the only thing I have of my own, the thing I love the most, my will. In return for my willingness and efforts to do so, I am immensely blessed by the Lord, as was Abraham. It would make sense to me that as the Lord teaches us how to love him, that those principles should also be applicable to all mankind as he taught that as we have done unto others, we have done unto him. How then, am I supposed to show my love for His children? I cannot offer my will unto them, for it must be a sacrifice only unto our God. I feel like there is more than just a willingness to do the types of service we talk about so often, but what exactly it is, I haven't come across yet in my mind. If you have any insights, I would love to hear them so that I can better learn how to love my fellow brothers and sisters.

What's in a name?

I have been thinking a lot recently about the importance of names. It's something I have pondered before, but am revisiting after a Relief Society lesson about the Sacrament. I have been reminded recently of how much my names mean and the large responsibility I have to present them well. When I am at home in Arizona, there are so many people who instantly love and respect me because of my last name. They know the type of people my family is and give me the same attributes. It seems hard to do damage to my families name there because it is so well regarded. I realized that one of the difficulties I have felt being away at school is the lack of recognition of my name. Most people have no idea what it means to be a Heywood or what kind of people they are. I have to build my own name here. I have been wondering how good of a job am I doing? I can think of many instances where I have not lived up to my names and it pains me. The attributes attached to me and my name affect not only me, but so many other people. It is not only my family either. As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, I have taken the name of Jesus Christ upon myself. I represent Him now. It pains me to know that I have not always done a stellar job. Gratefully, I am reminded of the power and purpose of the Atonement and know that I can be forgiven and can repent. As I have been thinking about my life and realized the importance of my names and my gratitude for such good ones, I have been saddened to realize that upon marriage, I will no longer be recognized by the name Heywood. It will still be one of my names, but not the one I give for recognition. I am sad to realize I will not carry that name forever or give it to my children for recognition. My only hope is to be able to find a man whos name I can respect and be proud to be known by. If I can find a man with a name respected and revered as mine is, then my children will hopefully someday come to a similar realization and appreciation, and I will not feel like I have lost something so great, but rather gained something new and wonderful.

Remember you are not kidding

When you bear your testimony, you are not kidding, remember you are not kidding. You have a confidence about you. You exude love to those around you. People recognize the differences in you. That's what makes our missionaries different.

Dear Blog,

I've been thinking about you. Obviously I haven't written until now. I do apologize, but you are not forgotten. Until next time. Me

Serious Frustration

This has now happened to me twice. I am reading a friends blog and decide to comment. I type a nice response, either witty or detailed and click the post comment button. Next thing I know, my comment is gone. It has simply disappeared into the vast darkness of the universe. No longer there to be read by others, or give me a sense of accomplishment. Just gone. I can't tell you how frustrating this is to me at this moment. I think about re-writing my post and then realize that I could, but it would take the time all over again and not be as good. I then decide not to re-post and am left with an empty feeling. I had such good thoughts to share and my friends will never see them because of the quirks of technology. Terribly frustrating!

Dread

One of the things I dread in life is having someone ask my opinion on something when I know they don't really want the answer nor is it likely to make a difference. What I like even less is when my opinion is based on feeling and of course after telling them what I think, the questioner then wants me to back it up. A logical argument for said feelings and opinions. I am not unable to give a good argument, to pull "proof" out of nowhere to back me up. Granted I usually do this while playing devils advocate, but that does not negate my abilities. What I do however refuse to do is be made to feel inconsequential simply because you cannot understand the basis of my feelings. Perhaps it is my fault that I cannot put in terms understandable and acceptable to you what exactly my feelings are based on, but I do not believe I should be discounted for that. It is not my fault that you have less of an affinity for feelings than I. Nor does it make me and my opinions less than you. I particularly dislike that it is a direct result of the questioner lying that I find my self being challenged to validate my feelings based on logic and proof. If you would have just accepted the truth when I said I didn't believe you would really want to know, we would not have a problem. You would continue living in your fantasy land, as you will do regardless, but I would not be frustrated by your invalidation of my feelings. Perhaps I should just learn to keep my mouth shut even when you say you want the truth. But then I would probably have issues about not saying anything at all and letting you live in lies.

Can't Sleep

As my title clearly states, I cannot sleep tonight. I am in quite a lot of pain despite the medications I am taking. Thus, this post is quite liable to make little sense. As of yet I have no clear purpose of writing except to pass a few moments time. What should I share? I suppose I should be quite glad I don't have very dark secrets that are often spilled at times such as this. A few embarrassing stories, but only a very few. I can say that after this procedure I have absolutely no desire to ever have a cesarean section unless absolutely necessary in an emergency situation. I am quite grateful for the pain medications I was given, particularly in the hospital, but I do dislike how they jumble my thoughts and memories. I think I have asked my mom the same questions at least three times because I cannot remember. It all seems so hazy as if it were a far away dream and I am incapable of separating reality from this dream. At least I slept then. And now, I bid you adieu for this is all the energy I can spare to writing and trying to make sense of the nonsense cavorting in my head.

Conclusion

Dear Friends and Readers, It has been a very long while since I last wrote. I offer no excuses or explanations. Nor can I promise I will be writing more frequently. I very well may not be. It's not that I don't enjoy writing, but so often things seem too muddy and confused in my life for me to sort through everything and write anything coherent or meaningful. As relating to the title of this post, I have little to say. It does not refer to any great awakenings in my life, or lessons I have learned. Quite the contrary. It means only that the hiatus I had taken from posting is now over. I would be happy to announce other grand conclusions in my life, but sadly I have none. I am no longer feel blind from the storm raging around me. Rather, I seem to be in the eye of the storm. Safe for the moment but for how long. And how safe am I really? I hardly know the things swirling around me so quickly. At any moment, I could become swept away with them. Would it lead to my destruction, or would I miraculously be set free? Or, will I be trapped here forever? Is there no way to set myself free? No one to save me and show me how? Who knows, perhaps I am still very blind and imagining the rest. Well friends, until next time. Let me leave you with this challenge; be true. With regards, ~C

Great News!

So much has been going on since my last blog post. I would love to fill you in on all of it but quite frankly, I don't think that's possible. I will try to give you some of the highlights instead.
Don't you just love it when everyone you see asks you what your plans are? Or what you want to do with your life? I do. I have finally found the right answers. For years I dreaded those questions, especially when I my plans had just changed or I had no idea what they were. Now, I have resolved on the perfect and continually true answers. I know you are dying to hear them, so I will share them with you. My plans are to keep praying and listening to the Spirit. If I do that, I know I will stay on the best path for my life. As for what I want to do with my life, to accomplish, I want to change the world. A lofty goal perhaps, nevertheless it is the truth. I want to change the world.
I have also been blessed to realize recently how involved the Lord is in my life. The reminders He sent me of that fact were beautiful tender mercies to me. I have the ability to make choices on my own, but He as an intricate master plan that I am a part of. How great is that?! He loves me enough to let me suffer and grow, to give me trials that I can learn and come closer to Him. Then when I think I have learned the lesson, He shows me how well He knows me, how much He has been involved in the whole process and how far I still have to go. The Lord truly is merciful.
I have had a greater appreciation recently for some of the hardships I have gone through as they have helped me to better understand others' pain. With that understanding has come an increased measure of love from the Lord for those people. Inevitably, by feeling His love for them, I am reminded of how much He loves me, and how much I love them because they truly are my brothers and sisters.
The opportunity to be a missionary is one of the greatest blessings we are given as Latter-Day Saints. We have been blessed with the responsibility to share our Father in Heaven's and Savior's love with our brothers and sisters here on this earth. That means that we get to feel His love for them and for us in abundance! We get to help them come to feel and understand that love and the gospel that accompanies it. And yet, there are so many times I hesitate to open my mouth. What a sad servant I am at times.
Which is what makes the plan so much more amazing, because that was accounted for already. The Plan of Happiness was in place before we ever came to this earth and received our mortal bodies. Before we ever failed on this earth, our loving Father put in place a plan that we might be redeemed. Our elder brother, even Jesus Christ, volunteered to carry out the Atonement. As a result, I can change. I am not stuck because at some moments I am afraid to open my mouth, or I falter and stumble over another personal hurdle. The scriptures teach us that we can be white as snow again. I know that to be the truth.
When I started this post, I had intended on sharing some political thoughts and feelings, but now, I think what I have written is much more worthwhile. I will suffice to say that I love America. I truly know that she is a blessed nation of God. We live in the promised land and have been blessed with prosperity and freedoms because of it, but we must remain righteous to keep them. It is because of our God, that we have been thus blessed, and we must remember. We must praise the Lord and give thanks, recognizing His hand in our most precious blessings of freedom, liberty and family. He still cares, we just need to show him that we do too.
Remember the great news!

The Spiral

You know those wishing wells you sometimes see in stores where you throw a penny in and it spins and spins each time around the perimeter getting closer and closer to the center. Each spin goes a little bit faster, is a little bit tighter until suddenly, there goes the penny down the hole in the center. Sometime I feel like I am that penny. I am out on the edge, just spinning around joyfully ignorant of what is coming next. Suddenly, I realize I'm not on the upper edge any longer, I'm in the middle. Well, that's alright, the middles not so bad, it's kinda fun in fact. The circles I am spinning on are going faster and we all know I love speed. Until of course, I realize that this fabulous fast spinning is taking me closer and closer to a hole. Now I am worried. Having no idea how to stop what I see coming, I spin and spin inching ever closer to that dark hole. What does it contain? How far will I fall this time? Sometimes the fall is far, sometimes something is blocking the hole and I don't actually fall in. Either way, I don't know while I'm spinning, and once I have started, there is nothing I, the penny, can do to stop it. I just have to wait to fall, hoping that I will survive this one and that someone will clean out the wishing well and I will get another chance. Is my only chance to be put back on the spinning wishing well to try to stop the spinning this go-round? Or is there something else I should be hoping for? Does the spinning ever stop? Is there anything besides the wishing well for this little penny? I don't know. Maybe someday I'll find a different ride. Until then, I suppose I will just keep spinning hoping to survive this round and that the fall will be short and cushioned.

My Favorite Catalyst

I was reflecting on my life the other day, thinking about some of the decisions I might be making. With one scenario, I thought, "That could be really hard, it could be like living in hell again. Oh well." I was excited about the challenge and how hard it would be. I have learned that it is during the hardest times, that I am growing and learning the most. During the easy times, I don't care so much or make as much effort. My state of being is constant, in homeostasis so to speak. In contrast, when things are harder, I make more of an effort, I change, I learn, then I come out on the other side much better than I was before. So, although hell is well, hell, it is the catalyst to the reaction required to result in positive change and growth. Nothing does it quite the same. Not even the proton. (Which by the way, is probably my second favorite catalyst.)

Adam-Ondi-Ahman

This past weekend I was able to travel to Missouri and Iowa for a cousin's wedding in Des Moines. While traveling, my mom and I made a few tourist stops. My favorite one was Adam-Ondi-Ahman. It was incredibly amazing and beautiful. Here are a few pictures from our visit.

Pied Piper Photography Contest

I LOVE photos. SO much. Don't always like having them taken of me, but I adore looking at them. I treasure the old photos I have of my parents, grandparents, and great-grandparents. My aunt told me about this gal, and I love her work. And who doesn't love to win free prizes right? So, I thought I would share the good news. Check it out and enter the contest!

New

Wow, definitely feeling the need for the new post. Just to clear the air. I am passionate about my beliefs whether spiritual, moral, or political, so I don't regret the last two posts, I needed to say what was said, but I feel the need for more positive energy in my blog. Here goes!
Have you ever felt like there was a moment when suddenly everything in life made sense? Life still isn't perfect of completely hunky dory, but you see truth now instead of the mess it appeared before? If not, I do so hope you find a moment like that in life. It has seriously changed mine. I think I have been working up to it for quite some time now, for say, about the past two years that have been my personal hell on earth. The thing of it is though, that now, no matter what challenges and struggles I encounter, I truly know that I can get through it. I basically figure that if I can go through those years and come out on the other side strong and alive, then I can handle anything. I can choose what my life will look like, who I will be, and how I will react to everything around me regardless of anyone or anything else.
One of my favorite New Testament stories is in Mark 5:24-34.
" 24 And Jesus went with him; and much people followed him, and thronged him.
25 And a certain woman, which had an issue of blood twelve years,
26 And had suffered many things of many physicians, and had spent all that she had, and was nothing bettered, but rather grew worse,
27 When she had heard of Jesus, came in the press behind, and touched his garment.
28 For she said, If I may touch but his clothes, I shall be whole.
29 And straightway the fountain of her blood was dried up; and she felt in her body that she was healed of that plague.
30 And Jesus, immediately knowing in himself that virtue had gone out of him, turned him about in the press, and said, Who touched my clothes?
31 And his disciples said unto him, Thou seest the multitude thronging thee, and sayest thou, Who touched me?
32 And he looked round about to see her that had done this thing.
33 But the woman fearing and trembling, knowing what was done in her, came and fell down before him, and told him all the truth.
34 And he said unto her, Daughter, thy faith hath made thee whole; go in peace, and be whole of thy plague."
I always wished to have as much faith as her. And although I still have some physical ailments, many of them seem to have miraculously disappeared. In their place I have found such things as joy, peace, hope, and agency. I may not be able to control whether or not I feel sick, but I can choose how to respond and how much faith I will show. Whether it happens on this earth, or in the life to come, I know that I too can hear the words of the Savior say to me "Daughter, thy faith hath made thee whole; go in peace and be whole of thy plague." Someday, because of my faith, I will be blessed with a body free and whole of this current plague. No matter what earthly challenges and hurts I may encounter, I can choose to go forward through them with faith, building it up until one day it will be great enough for the miracle. So that when the Lord asks me if I believe before he performs the miracle, rather than saying, "help thou my unbelief", I can say "Yea Lord, I know".

CPUSA

As a side note to my post earlier today, do you know what CPUSA is? Have you ever heard of it before? Me neither, at least not until recently. Its the Communist Party USA. I thought I was going to regurgitate my food when I found out about this. So much for the Red Scare, Democracy, the Constitution, FREEDOM. And yes, they have been active for all ninety years since the first Red Scare. If you don't already have enough nightmares, here's a link to their site.

Science and Technology, or Communism Commentary?

Recently, my thoughts have been turned towards the situation we Americans find our country in. It is as if I awoke one day, took of my rose colored glasses, but what I saw was still colored red. You may think I am being dramatic and that perhaps my views and beliefs are out-dated. So be it. Quite frankly, to any of you, I personally believe that you are part of what has brought us, the United States of America a country endowed by God, to the threshold of ruin.
As I have been studying and pondering the position we are in politically and socially, I have been appalled by the realization that I was indoctrinated from, well, at least Elementary school. The most apparent indoctrination happened during my high school education. Perhaps you too, learned of the Red Scare at some point during your education. If you were to guess which class I learned about it in, the top guesses would be Social Studies. A History or Government class would make the most logical sense. Unfortunately, you couldn't be more wrong. Not once was the Red Scare even mentioned in any of those classes. No, no, I learned about it in my Junior English class with Ms. Golden. Regular level English even, not Honors or AP. And Ms. Golden, an aging woman who knew much about the subject she taught, but kept her maiden name although married, and had lived a life breaking free from the social ideals of the time she was born in. Would you like to now hear about why we learned about the Red Scare in Junior English?
We were reading The Crucible, in class. Its author, Arthur Miller, had been a part of the Communist Party of the United States of America. Of course, we weren't told that at the time. What we learned was about McCarthyism, the practice of making reckless and unsubstantiated accusations of treason, disloyalty, subversion, anti-patriotism against political adversaries. I will say that much of what happened during the second Red Scare, was unconstitutional, and I therefore cannot support the means that were taken to find, prosecute, and punish those involved in communist activities. What we were taught in school however, made it seem as if it were all a bad joke, a huge mistake made by the government, that there was no reason for concern or action against these people. We didn't learn about Communism and Socialism and the horrors the people ruled by it live through. Nor did we learn about the dangers presented to our great Nation by such ideologies. Instead, we learned that there was nothing to fear in the first place. I'm sorry Ms. Golden, for I hate to disrespect my elders and those who have taught me, and I did like you at the time, but you couldn't be more wrong. And yes, I do hold you personally responsible for the current disastrous position that I find my country in. You and many others.
I hate to be frustrated with my ancestors, for I come from a very good line of people, but in this one instance, I am. Could you not have awaken, and stopped smelling the roses, to see what you were creating for me? The horrible mess and treacherous position I and my children now must fight to keep? The current culture, political, economical, and moral, is not what I ever wanted to be living in, but now, I find myself hoping that we can stave of full Communism, that we can keep the few freedoms we still have, stop the government from taking more. And then, of course, the young people of our country, my own generation, my peers, are blinded too. Does no one remember history? Has no one ever heard of Hitler? The age who should be fighting harder and more ardently than any other to keep our freedoms, to protect our rights and re-gain control of our government and the truths of our Constitution, are blinded and give it all away for the glittery word "Change". Change. Thank you Mr. President Obama for the change you will bring to our country. Perhaps it will cause my peers to see the truth of what they have chosen. Did you know that this exact situation was promised to the US by Nikita Khrushchev, Premier of the Soviet Union? And yet, the Red Scare was just a joke, a big mistake.
Another discovery that similarly disgusted me, was that of realizing the message of Brave New World by Aldous Huxley. This book we happened to read my Senior year in English. I was in a combined English 101/102 and AP class. In these, the advanced classes, aren't the students supposed to be taught how to understand the underlying themes and messages of pieces of literature? That's certainly what I thought. The thing about it is, that we really didn't learn any of that. The depth of analysis we did on Brave New World was so close to the surface it is almost comical. Almost, but not quite. Again, I have another wonderful teacher, Mr. Myers, to thank for educating me so well.
Back to the point of bringing up the bold novel. At first glance, it seems mostly to discuss the danger of new science and technology, and the use of drugs. More important than those issues however, is the drastic difference it paints between a government controlled society and one of "savages". Huxley's creation of a dystopian society not only shows us the potential dangers of allowing science and technology to be controlled by the government, but also of the loss of human nature that occurs when the government gains complete control of society. The World State is seen as providing happiness through stability. The belief of one of its ten controllers is that the social stability providing the happiness, indeed does sacrifice truth, but, is the greater good of the two. Truth sacrificed for a meaningless happiness. And only a sense of happiness since most of it comes from a wide and government supported use of a hallucinogenic drug called soma. Another large contributor to the sense of happiness is the lack of morals. Monogamy and families are abhorrent ideas in the World State. Abortions are common, but are controlled by the fact that even becoming pregnant is such a terrible idea that contraceptives are used consistently by all females able to get pregnant. (Which I should note, are only those of the upper two classes of society).
The societal classes of the novel are created by the government, with no option for moving up or down. Each embryo is conditioned physically and mentally for an exclusive social class. No matter whether in truth they were a bit inferior as Bernard Marx is, or a bit superior, as Helmholtz Watson is, each person is stuck with what they have been conditioned for. This conditioning is leads to the ruination of Linda. Giving birth to a child is the ultimate humiliation for her, and she is not able to understand and live by the Savages ideas. Soma and death are the only escape for her. John, the Savage, not having been conditioned for anything, finds himself unable to conform to a society with no morals and no real substance. The society of the World State, is the picture of Communism. Every one has their place in life, and what they need for that life. All of society is under the close monitoring and control of the government. There is no stepping out-of-bounds allowed. You can choose to conform, or to be exiled. It is noted in the novel that human nature is lost in this society.
Another point to be noted, is that it was after a visit to the United States, and viewing our culture, that Aldous Huxley wrote brave New World. He was appalled by our culture, the gratification we allowed ourselves, and afraid of it overtaking European culture. However, at the end of his novel, when particularly stating that the direction's that John's feet swing as if a compass when he is hanging, that Huxley makes a crucial point. It is a statement that the United States will not be able to survive if it doesn't conform to socialistic and communistic society and ideals. We will swing one way and then the other, till we land in the East on socialism and communism, without ever swinging to the West.
Are you wondering yet, when this lengthy post is going to end? Soon, I promise. My point in explaining what I have learned in school about the Red Scare, and what we should have learned about Brave New World is to help shine light on the situation our country is now it. We have allowed our country to be run over and poisoned bit by bit by socialist and communists hiding in the corner. If we do not begin to fight back, we will have lost the Cold War sooner than we realize it hasn't ended yet. As Khrushcev promised, it won't be a physical battle, but i has come on for many years bit by bit. If you, dear fellow Americans do not wake up immediately to the truth of this, when you wake up tomorrow, the free US, will be a communist nation. We cannot allow this kind of tragedy to occur. It has come to far already. We must rise up to fight back. We must teach our youth, our children, even our adults what the truth is. Not the propaganda and indoctrination we have become so accustomed to, but the truth. That the United States of America, is a nation endowed by God, if we but keep our morals, values, liberties and freedoms. If we fight for our families, our rights, our religions. Our founding fathers created a Constitution to protect those rights and liberties, so long as we the people cared about them. Many of them are no longer being protected, but have been exploited. If you and I and our children have any hope for being free tomorrow, we must take a stand today. I personally, have no desire to live in that "brave new world". I claim the right to be free, to choose how, where, and what to worship, to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, to the ability to raise a family with values and principles. These rights are not given by government, but it is the duty of a government to protect them. Currently, that is not happening. Take a stand America. Wake up and see the Red that is all around us. Fight back. Don't sit smelling the roses. Remember who we are. Remember our Nation's heritage and the men and women who have died protecting it and to create it.

Reminders

Last week I had two great reminders from Above that I am not alone in this journey. Both small and simple, but so meaningful to me. The first was simply that I received an email back from the admissions director of the school I want to go to. I had been debating on what to do about school, and after trying a few different options, felt like I should at least send an email to them. I asked a few questions and wondered if it would be possible to talk to some of the students about them. I also asked about additional sources of funding besides student loans, ie. scholarships. After about a week I received the reply. It was so kind and helpful. Such a change from the typical I am used to dealing with at schools. And such a testimony to me, that when we follow the promptings of the Holy Spirit, we will be blessed. So even though I don't know if the plan is for me to end up going to school there or not, I know that I will be blessed for following whatever path I am set on.
The second happened while I was at the temple doing proxy work in the Baptistry. A woman came up to me and thanked me for the work I had just done because one of the names was her mother-in-laws. She also thanked me for her husband who was there with her. It was so sweet. A wonderful reminder that what we do in the temple means so much to so many, in addition to blessing our lives. I was so grateful for the tender mercies of the Lord, and that I was able to recognize them as such. Its great to be reminded that my Heavenly Father loves me and is watching over me.